How can you be upset when you live your life with it?
And what is disappointment when you feel that every single time?
Saturday, December 27, 2008
Thursday, December 25, 2008
What Is Family For?
Today I wonder what family is for? I can only think of make use of each other and taking advantage of whatever benefits they can reap out of it.
I would say that i give my dad between 10-15 thousand dollars every year. And have to buy groceries and pay whenever there is breakdown of machines or need to buy new stuff in the house.
Noone bothers that I am rarely at home, coming back once in a month or two. All that matters is that money is in their account once the salary is in. It does not matter that you are trying to save money for something as they think their stuff is more important than anything else. And that includes having a business for more than five years but not earning any profit out of it because of the inability to charge anyone for the item sold. Excuses would be this is business strategy which I can never understand it seems. Example would be free for old people, divorcees, jobless people, people with kids. Really just non stop free stuff with me to bail out the losses. How much I love them TOTALLY. Eventhough it is my money, I should never question what they need the money which will never roll back to me ever again.
People who only be nice to you so that they can use your credit card to purchase items and also get you to be sponsors or someone to pay for meals and shopping for occassions.
Totally sick of it and cant wait to get out of my family. Hopes 2009 is the year.
I would say that i give my dad between 10-15 thousand dollars every year. And have to buy groceries and pay whenever there is breakdown of machines or need to buy new stuff in the house.
Noone bothers that I am rarely at home, coming back once in a month or two. All that matters is that money is in their account once the salary is in. It does not matter that you are trying to save money for something as they think their stuff is more important than anything else. And that includes having a business for more than five years but not earning any profit out of it because of the inability to charge anyone for the item sold. Excuses would be this is business strategy which I can never understand it seems. Example would be free for old people, divorcees, jobless people, people with kids. Really just non stop free stuff with me to bail out the losses. How much I love them TOTALLY. Eventhough it is my money, I should never question what they need the money which will never roll back to me ever again.
People who only be nice to you so that they can use your credit card to purchase items and also get you to be sponsors or someone to pay for meals and shopping for occassions.
Totally sick of it and cant wait to get out of my family. Hopes 2009 is the year.
Friday, December 19, 2008
Sleep Blogging
I am falling sick.
God next two weeks, no bf, no Irene, no Serene, no Max, no Bell. As if it is not dead enough in this office with everyone in the holiday mood. Worse is there is noone to even have a conversation with. Gloomy..
Was planning to go to JB for movie marathon with the siblings tomorrow but then just read the papers this morning due to the new causeway, there are like massive human congestion waiting for the bus, which might take 3 hours or something to get back to Singapore. Not worth the trouble.
Has been shopping for Xmas gifts the past few days and still not done yet. Enjoying myself though while getting soaked in the festival mood.
Still thinking about my New Year resolution which includes quitting smoking, dressing up more often, going to the gym more often. Sure sounds busy.
In less than two months I will be 25. How time flies.
God next two weeks, no bf, no Irene, no Serene, no Max, no Bell. As if it is not dead enough in this office with everyone in the holiday mood. Worse is there is noone to even have a conversation with. Gloomy..
Was planning to go to JB for movie marathon with the siblings tomorrow but then just read the papers this morning due to the new causeway, there are like massive human congestion waiting for the bus, which might take 3 hours or something to get back to Singapore. Not worth the trouble.
Has been shopping for Xmas gifts the past few days and still not done yet. Enjoying myself though while getting soaked in the festival mood.
Still thinking about my New Year resolution which includes quitting smoking, dressing up more often, going to the gym more often. Sure sounds busy.
In less than two months I will be 25. How time flies.
Friday, November 28, 2008
Sunday, November 23, 2008
Damn I'm Old
Been home a lot the past few weeks and dawned on me after so much findings that I am old.
Home
----
Sis completed her O levels while my bro his A's. Next year is a new lease of life altogether for them. My two bros will be in the army and my sis hopefully will be in a polytechnic. **pray, pray, cross fingers and pray more.
My and dad will be half a century next year. Oh that makes me turn a quarter of a century. Damn again.
My two bros both have chinese gf and suspect my sis has a bf but uncertain, she's so secretive. My 3rd bro uses my old drowned in the toilet bowl when i was peeing blackberry, and was looking at the old smses i have in that phone, when i came across that he has a gf and was looking forward to a night of clubbing. Shit, here comes those late nights I went through before. Not that I am the party every week person though.
My Uncles
---------
Just doesnt get what is wrong with them really, can never click with them, dont think like ever. Yday my 6th Uncle picked us siblings up to his house for his son's 2nd birthday. He was asking why I didnt own a car licence and didnt bother to take one. I snapped saying that I wasn't interested. That came back with a retort that I should have then buy a car for my brother as he has a license. Just because my Uncle was buying a car. I dont understand people around me really, they seem so oblivious that everywhere is cutting staff, and companies gone down under.
I overheard them saying that these companies retrenching people are just making a big huha out of nothing, that they are all blowing things out of proportion. Does it need the government to declare a techincal recession before they fall flat on their butt with shock or what?!
Anyway back to my 6th Uncle. Who the F*** is he to tell me that? My 2nd brother is an irresponsible shit who is selfish to his bones, and he expect me to buy him a car. Who the hell is he really. Even ever since he has a car license, he used his gf's car, who by the way is a stewardess, and drive around it. The only time he offer us for a ride is when he needs to top up petrol, ie. to pay for all his travelling trips. Just hate talking about him.
Back to the topic I was going to babble about; feeling and being old. My cousins are all grown up with the weirdest sense of fashion ever seen especially from my 3rd Uncle's kids. Haikal is now working in Novotel, and Hakim just got his PSLE results.
And just, looking at Haikal's friendster profile of him and his 19th month gf. He wrote it there alright. My 4th Aunt is pregnant with second kid, my 6th Uncle trying for another. How can I not feel old. All my cousins are big man!
Not to mention the constant nagging for me to get married. Really totally hate that, and eveyone trying to decide how i run my life. Feel like just slapping every single one of them to not look far, just look at their own kids and family before commenting on others. I am beginning to hate even more all the family gatherings, where all their motive is to compare all the cousins, who is doing better. Just cant wait to get lost from this family. Well, that is the only reason i want to be married. After all I am only a daughter, and I have done so much for this family. Time to wash my hands now..
I am off track as usual but just get agitated. Hope growing old keeps my sane.
Home
----
Sis completed her O levels while my bro his A's. Next year is a new lease of life altogether for them. My two bros will be in the army and my sis hopefully will be in a polytechnic. **pray, pray, cross fingers and pray more.
My and dad will be half a century next year. Oh that makes me turn a quarter of a century. Damn again.
My two bros both have chinese gf and suspect my sis has a bf but uncertain, she's so secretive. My 3rd bro uses my old drowned in the toilet bowl when i was peeing blackberry, and was looking at the old smses i have in that phone, when i came across that he has a gf and was looking forward to a night of clubbing. Shit, here comes those late nights I went through before. Not that I am the party every week person though.
My Uncles
---------
Just doesnt get what is wrong with them really, can never click with them, dont think like ever. Yday my 6th Uncle picked us siblings up to his house for his son's 2nd birthday. He was asking why I didnt own a car licence and didnt bother to take one. I snapped saying that I wasn't interested. That came back with a retort that I should have then buy a car for my brother as he has a license. Just because my Uncle was buying a car. I dont understand people around me really, they seem so oblivious that everywhere is cutting staff, and companies gone down under.
I overheard them saying that these companies retrenching people are just making a big huha out of nothing, that they are all blowing things out of proportion. Does it need the government to declare a techincal recession before they fall flat on their butt with shock or what?!
Anyway back to my 6th Uncle. Who the F*** is he to tell me that? My 2nd brother is an irresponsible shit who is selfish to his bones, and he expect me to buy him a car. Who the hell is he really. Even ever since he has a car license, he used his gf's car, who by the way is a stewardess, and drive around it. The only time he offer us for a ride is when he needs to top up petrol, ie. to pay for all his travelling trips. Just hate talking about him.
Back to the topic I was going to babble about; feeling and being old. My cousins are all grown up with the weirdest sense of fashion ever seen especially from my 3rd Uncle's kids. Haikal is now working in Novotel, and Hakim just got his PSLE results.
And just, looking at Haikal's friendster profile of him and his 19th month gf. He wrote it there alright. My 4th Aunt is pregnant with second kid, my 6th Uncle trying for another. How can I not feel old. All my cousins are big man!
Not to mention the constant nagging for me to get married. Really totally hate that, and eveyone trying to decide how i run my life. Feel like just slapping every single one of them to not look far, just look at their own kids and family before commenting on others. I am beginning to hate even more all the family gatherings, where all their motive is to compare all the cousins, who is doing better. Just cant wait to get lost from this family. Well, that is the only reason i want to be married. After all I am only a daughter, and I have done so much for this family. Time to wash my hands now..
I am off track as usual but just get agitated. Hope growing old keeps my sane.
Monday, November 17, 2008
Fake Decision
I have decided to delude myself and be fake. Since people can never handle when I say the truth, I will show my goodwill and just be nice to everyone and tell them anything they would love to hear about themselves.
I want to be so sickeningly nice and see how far they push my buttons before i explode.
yes that would be a nice Xmas present.
I want to be so sickeningly nice and see how far they push my buttons before i explode.
yes that would be a nice Xmas present.
Sunday, November 16, 2008
Boring Sundays
Damn been so long since i spend the whole day in my house. So dead bored. would like to go for walk but dont have my sneakers here. Feel like cooking the entire day, will make crepes with nutella, banana and strawberries. Shit i wonder why I am getting fat but just enjoy eating so much.
Feels so depressed with the financial crisis and a raging temptation to shop and dine. Need to exercise my self-control.
Have watched Money No Enough 2 and School for Scoundrels today. Was supposed to go to grandma's house since yesterday but too lazy to do so. Anyway will be meeting her next week for Aiman's birthday and also for the Wedding.
December is coming and going to use so much money and man still have not recovered from the Hari Raya expenditures. Will use so much money to buy corporate gifts and also go for lunches, hope we dont have to go much this Xmas as Boss told us to lessen the budget but still! No idea what to get that bugger for Xmas present, totally no idea at all.
Hari Raya Haji is coming and it will be a long weekend. Hope I can go for a short trip then.Well meantime, think I will just bore the shit out of myself.
Feels so depressed with the financial crisis and a raging temptation to shop and dine. Need to exercise my self-control.
Have watched Money No Enough 2 and School for Scoundrels today. Was supposed to go to grandma's house since yesterday but too lazy to do so. Anyway will be meeting her next week for Aiman's birthday and also for the Wedding.
December is coming and going to use so much money and man still have not recovered from the Hari Raya expenditures. Will use so much money to buy corporate gifts and also go for lunches, hope we dont have to go much this Xmas as Boss told us to lessen the budget but still! No idea what to get that bugger for Xmas present, totally no idea at all.
Hari Raya Haji is coming and it will be a long weekend. Hope I can go for a short trip then.Well meantime, think I will just bore the shit out of myself.
